Embrace the Reality of Possibilities

"Listen to the mustn'ts child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me. Anything can happen chile, anything can be." ~ Shel Silverstein

As we move through the reset energy of the Winter Solstice into the dawn of a new year, we look toward possibilities. If we are wise, we accept the knowledge that anything can happen. 

Murphy's Law is the idiom that says, whatever can go wrong, just might. Upsets can happen that unravel our hallmark hall of fame moments. Our children can go astray, those we love can disenchant us, our professional choices can blow up in our faces, and our health can fail. It doesn't matter how meticulous our plans or that we have followed all the rules. 

However, there are a multitude of occasions for joy and we should never shrink from opportunities to create meaningful experiences.

The key to joyous living is the relinquishing of control and to express gratitude for each moment. The truth is our disappointments bring balance to our victories. This is the epic journey of the soul and what transforms us into a more courageous version of the higher self. Just as we embrace our joys, we must embrace our pains. 

"Fear was about possibilities. Not things that happened. Things that might." ~ Michael Grant

Life is not either or, but all and even yet more when our confidence rests in the Wisdom and Breath of Almighty God. 

Proverbs 19:21 states, "A man's mind may be full of designs, but the purpose of Jehovah is unchanging." Embrace the reality of your possibilities by trusting Him with all your hopes as a new year dawns.

Have you made peace with the wishes that seem to have eluded you this past year?
What plans are you launching as possibilities in the new year?
Are you willing to release your attachment to outcomes in the coming year?

"A new day: Be open enough to see opportunities. Be wise enough to be grateful. Be courageous enough to be happy." ~ Steve Maraboli

Recover Yourself!

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Reflecting On Birthdays

"We start as fools and become wise through experience." ~ African Proverb

I welcomed another birthday this week and I am finding as the years pass, the theme of each solar anniversary changes. This year I awakened to gratitude. Not just for family, health, hearth, and home, but for learning. 

My grandfather used to say, "God gave us two ears and one mouth for one reason; He wants us to listen twice as much as we talk."

"So then faith cometh by hearing and hearing by the Word of God." ~ Romans 10:17

I have finally begun absorbing the wisdom of my grandfather's advice. The past few years have been trying and due to my commitment to lean in and listen I have grown through each experience. Though this is a far more challenging approach to living as opposed to deflection when something doesn't feel good or suit my ego mind, it is the path to transformation and merging with the higher self.

"Age has given me what I have been looking for my entire life. It has given me, me." ~ Anne Lamott

I do not feel older, I feel wiser. Not so much because I know more, but because I am open to knowing more. I have become less fearful of the closed doors lining the dark hallway of the unknown. My surrender to the Creator's plan for my life promises that enlightenment awaits beyond each of them. 

My goal now is to want for nothing. To be at peace in each moment granted. To extinguish the controlling desires of my ego self and no longer live in resistance to change. I want to believe each year will grow me closer to Nirvana, the peace of God that surpasses all understanding. Knowing that even in difficult times I can find purpose and take meaning in every challenge, my freedom increasing with each step.

How do you view your birthdays?
Are you leaning in to your experiences as they are happening?
What are you learning from the person you are becoming?

"I said to the sun, 'Tell me about the big bang.' The sun said, "It hurts to become." ~ Andrea Gibson

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Own The Power of Saying No

"It takes effort to say no when our heart and brains and guts and, most important, pride are yearning to say yes. Practice." ~ Cole Harmonson

My mother came to live with me awhile following the birth of my daughter. Amidst her careful instruction in diaper changing, nursing, bathing, and burping the one lesson she reinforced was mastery in the art of saying no. "Stand at the mirror and practice every possible way to deliver the news. Trust me it is a necessity in parenting," she admonished. 

Not only is owning the power of your no necessary in parenting, it is vital to the preservation and self care of our inner most being.

"Always remember: you have a right to say no without having to explain yourself. Be at peace with your decisions." ~ Stephanie Lahart

In his book, The Four Agreements, Don Miquel Ruiz, advises we honor ourselves and others by learning to be impeccable with our word. Agreeing to or accepting circumstances in our lives that meet the needs of others before serving our own inner peace is a betrayal of self and those we give a false sense of security through our less than straight forward communications. 

We are to use the power of our words in the direction of truth and love and honoring our no is a healthy way of maintaining boundaries and teaching others how we would like to be treated. 

Mind you, having been born a fire sign translates to my seldom being at a loss when it comes to expressing my truth and those close to me might agree my issue falls in the areas of tact and tone.

"Tone is the hardest part of saying no." ~ Jonathan Price

Intention is everything. A no can hurt and should never be used as a weapon designed to injure the spirit of a fellow traveler nor should it be withheld out of fear. Though sometimes it may be tempting to entertain the ego self by wearing the mask of false martyrdom, this only stalls the inevitable bad news until we can no longer endure the weight of an insincere yes. 

So commit to kindness as best you can starting with yourself. We must seek to communicate with love and learning to accept disappointing news with grace is an invaluable life skill.

Know that saying yes is not always possible and that no is a complete sentence. Honor your being and the hearts of others by learning to deliver your words impeccably with love.

How often do you dishonor yourself by saying yes when you mean no?

What keeps you from owning the power of your no?
Are you carrying burdens today saying no can release you from?

"No is a complete sentence and so often we forget that. When we don't want to do something we can simply smile and say no." ~ Susan Gregg

The Journey of Friendship

"I imagine a line, a white line, painted on the sand and on the ocean, from me to you." ~ Jonathan Safran Foer

I lost another friend this past week. 

A neighborhood pal I played kickball and green light go with after school. He had taught me to ride a bike and the last time we were together we laughed heartily over a pancake dinner. 

It was a great time and though it had been many years since we were in one another's company, it felt the same. I found that his warmth and humor had never left my spirit. 

When my best girlfriend since 7th grade transitioned a few years back, I came to know a new pain, unlike the loss of a parent. 

Our friends are the ones we tell our secrets to and accomplish those bucket list items we would never let mom and dad know about. Our friends are the ones who tell the truth even when it hurts and meet us at the crossroads when we are set upon by the realities of life. And though we must move on with our lives, it is difficult to continue the journey without them.

"At sunset the little soul that had come with the dawning went away, leaving heartbreak behind it." ~ L.M. Montgomery

Of course I know grief and loss are part of the life cycle, but it does not help my heart hurt any less. And so I am initiated into a new club. One in which we bid farewells to those friendship ties we never think will be paused. A club in which we learn to accept the brevity of time and the value of shared moments and memories. 

"Don't cry for the horses
They will be back someday
When our time has come
They will show us the way"
~ Brenda Riley-Seymore

How do you define friendship?
When you reflect upon your childhood friendships what stands out as most meaningful?
What are you doing to cultivate the friendship connections you value the most?

"Friendships, especially those born in childhood, take root in us. When one is lost, a branch withers but it does not die. Joy yet lingers in the remnants of shared laughter." ~ JoiLotus

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